Last night our son was doing something fairly innocuous- bumping into me when we were unloading the car or not doing something in the order I asked him to do it. I can’t even recall what exactly it was, but I remember feeling annoyed with him and however I responded landed on him with a hurtful look, “Like, geesh, Dad, whatever I did wasn’t that huge for you to be so disappointed in me.”
I could blame it on being extra tired, because his younger brother had woken me before 5:00am that morning. I could blame it on being cold or hungry. But I just shouldn’t blame it on anything, and just not be so harsh on him.
He is a good kid. He has a huge heart. He looks out for his classmates and his peers. He’s respectful, polite, and thoughtful. His teachers tell me that he is well-liked and admired.
I don’t want him to be perfect and I know he’s going to make plenty of mistakes. I just get annoyed when he is impulsive, unaware of his body, or he doesn’t think of the consequences of his actions.
As a third grade teacher, I spend my days with eight and nine-year olds. Maybe I’m just tired of my students not always doing the things I ask them to do, and I take it out on our son, thinking that he needs to make up for others ignoring my repeated directions, other’s impulsivity, or other’s seemingly unsympathetic behaviors. I probably just need to give our son a break. Like I said, he’s a good kid. He can be impulsive or unaware at times, but so it goes for kids his age.
MarkR's Musings 
Repeated directions are the bane of my existence. You hit it though- the impulsivity and lack of awareness of his body. I had to tell a student 5 times to stop doing one of those Fortnite dances in the middle of my Student Teacher’s lesson…really? Hang in there…a sense of humor helps. They are only little for a moment.
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It is a challenge to teach the age your own children are–there is no break! Sounds like you have a great kid !
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You know Dad, it’s refreshing you’re aware of this and articulate it, write it down, remember for change’s sake, but stuff like this doesn’t make you .. bad.
Please add in there that you’re not going to let it define you.. a good man, a good Dad.
In my experience, Dads start to internalize this stuff and then it just gets spiral. Dad’s not good enough, things are messed up.
I hope you get good rest tonight and have a beautiful, very happy day tomorrow.. but every moment is a new one… Family counts on Dad! I hope you have a nice, nice good night for your fam.
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I hear you. I feel the same some days too. I have also felt the reverse.. my daughter has given me the run for my money on a morning and now I am facing 17 5-year olds that have done nothing and I find my frustration seep out for the littlest things. I guess it is good we recognize it and hopefully avoid it in the future.
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You’ve been truly honest and reflected on what happened. Teachers’ children have to endure our teacher directions, all the time. I also have to tell myself many times, I am mummy now. Thanks for sharing.
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So true! Thanks for sympathizing and sharing!
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This is another one of your posts to which I can really relate. I definitely have less patience with my son’s behavior after being around my fifth graders all day, and it is unfair to me son.
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